Witness Yourself

Beneath the chaotic waves of our mind lies an ocean of stillness and peace, but most of us do not feel it. This surface turbulence consists of our thoughts and is produced by our ego and our superego (our conditionings). With the more or less constant mental chatter that they create, we cannot feel the glory of our being, our spirit – that pure spark of divinity.

Looking at them more closely - the ego tends to produce thoughts which are futuristic and have as their basis false ideas of greatness, while the superego tends to produce thoughts that are connected to the past and have as their basis, false ideas of badness or sinfulness.

By the time we are adults, most of our thinking falls into a limited set of thought patterns. The more we traverse these thought patterns, the more powerful they become. It is like a well-worn path in our mind.

Biologically, thought patterns are made up of large sets of neural connections in our brain. Each time we follow this path, the neural connections that make up this thought pattern become stronger. Every time the neurons are fired, their connection becomes stronger (this is how memories become stronger with the number of times they have been recalled). The strength of the neural connection is also affected by the emotional state we are in. A strong emotional state, negative or positive, will strengthen the connection.

As we enter into these thought patterns from many different angles, we make numerous side paths that join this well-worn path. So we have more and more entrances that slip us into our basic thought patterns. That is why in time these thoughts become more and more difficult to avoid. They keep us mired in illusion and we cannot feel and experience the inner truth and beauty of our spirit.

As seekers, many of us can feel the call of something more in life – some deeper reality even in the chaos of our minds. So we try and break free from our mental activities. We try and fight our thoughts; we try and fight our ego and superego.

The problem with this is that in order to fight, the enemy must be there. So it is ineveitable that in the process of fighting, we call up the thought pattern in our minds. Now every time this thought pattern exists in our minds, we make the path more deeply worn. The neural connections become stronger. Also, in fighting, we move ourselves into a strong emotional state (of frustration, anger, or sadness) which again strengthens the connection. By fighting our thoughts we make them stronger. Fighting our ego and superego is not the answer.

From a purely human level there is no answer. We cannot overcome the thoughts from the level of the mind. We must have access to a higher plane in order to move above the thoughts. This is why self-realization through the awakening of the kunadlini is so crucial. As this energy passes through the Sahasrara (the crown chakra), our attention has the ability to move above the mind.

“But it is useless to fight with your ego. In Sahaja Yoga you do not have to fight with your ego, but you have just to see it because your attention is itself awakened. Your ego cools down by just seeing, as your attention is enlightened. In that light you witness the play of your ego and laugh at it and laugh at the ideas given by your ego. As you start seeing yourself, your ego starts getting deflated and as your ego is deflated you rise in your light." (Shri Mataji, translated from a speech in Hindi 08/18/1979 in Delhi, India)

Whenever thought patterns arise, whether from the ego or superego, we must witness them and not react. If we do nothing to stenghten them they will fade as a path in the forest fades over time if no one uses it. Gradually you will find that the thought patterns become a fainter and fainter glimmer. As this happens the peace and joy of your spirit will shine into your attention with an every increasing light.